Nana with love

Nana with love

By: Heather Walton

My first days in the world you held my hand

you asked God why and tried to understand

I became mommy’s miracle baby in more than one way

and got stronger day by day

You held my hand and watched me grow

You always let your worries show

Yet you thought about me day and night

And hoped I would get through everything alright

I was two and you held my hand

In my car seat to help me fall asleep

You watched me run butt naked in the heat

You helped me fold the towels neat

upon my lap on the potty seat

You held my hand and watched me grow

You always let your worries show

Yet you thought about me day and night

And hoped I would get through everything alright

I was three and you held my hand

On our way to the swings at stirling house

A warning to papa to bring me home in time

From short beach and the playground slide

We played hopscotch, ate rainbow ice cream, and had our afternoon tea

And we can’t forget those clothes pins you and papa pinned on me

The endless afternoons of playing cards and the food of make believe

We can’t forget Barney and the pipe curls you set

and playing in the red hydrant to get wet

we filled up the pool to go for a swim

then came along my sister named kristen

this poem gets a little tacky I know

but we still have a long way yet to go

You held my hand and watched me grow

You always let your worries show

Yet you thought about me day and night

And hoped I would get through everything alright

I was many different ages between now and then

Sometimes I wish those times could come back again

You held my hand through it all not once did you ever let me fall

I went from talking to you about Barbies to talking about boys

Pictures with pipe curls to pictures with poise

From dancing and singing putting on shows

To writing about much more than I should’ve ever known

From 9 am phone calls to 9 times a day

Who’d of known I’d ever have that much to say

One night a year and a half ago I was with some friends just to spend the day

And pretend like everything was okay but none of the feelings went away

My thinking of you and worrying if you would pull through sometimes I wish there was something I could do

I held your hand and watched you go

I never let my worries show

Yet I thought about you day and night

And hoped you would get through everything alright

I was seventeen and I held your hand

I cried for your pain and for the days you would miss

We both laughed as I told you of my first kiss

You told me not to cry and that everyone has to go sometime

I reassured you of how the support system in this family is just fine

You promised you would never leave and the day you did God gave you wings

To sit on my shoulder and watch over things

So that’s where you’ll stay for the rest of my days

No matter where I end up or where my head lays.

Your last days in this world I held your hand

I asked God why and tried to understand

You became my Guardian Angel in more than one way

And I get stronger day by day

I succeed at most of the things I do today and it’s all because I was taught how to do them by Nana with love.

This poem is my favorite because i wrote it for my nana Marge Michalek after she lost her year and a half long battle to cancer. It was the second half of the eulogy i wrote and presented to our friends and family the morning of her funeral.  I have never been so proud of any other work i have written and that is why it is my favorite.

The first half went as follows;

Your chair is just a chair without you sitting there

Your photo is just a photo without a memory to go to

Your voice is just a voice without it’s reoccurring noise

Ownership is just a label if you are no longer able

To call what was once yours your own

because it now belongs to another home

As I sit here and reminisce the emptiness is indisputable

And our relationship indescribable

My sanity questionable and my certainty unreliable

You are irreplaceable and we are indivisible

The thought of you leaving not pleasurable and the loneliness inexplicable  

All ending are beginnings we just don’t know it at the time

Those who leave sweet memories live forever in our hearts

On Thursday May 8^th 2008 at about 8:50pm I lost my Nana my sounding board my advice giver my defender my best friend and my biggest fan. I told her everything even the things you should never tell a grandmother or even your own mother, but that never stopped me. She gave me her opinion even when it wasn’t wanted and her advice when it wasn’t taken even though Nana somehow always knew best. She taught me how to give more and receive less, how to see the best in people even when they didn’t deserve it. She taught me how to give people second chances even though they were on my last nerve. She showed me modesty and devotion and how love was, and always will be in the little things. She taught me how to keep on going when it wasn’t easy and that sometimes you just have to let things go because dreams can change in a heartbeat and what is important to you one minute may be the least important thing to you the next.. Even though I may not have always had the greatest ideas she supported me no matter how big or small the task was at hand and plus she knew better because once I had my mind set there was no turning back.  She also taught me what it was like to be dedicated which is exactly what she was to her Judge Judy and she taught me patience because that is what I had to be until it was over to have her full and undivided attention. Actions speak louder than words and she proved this to be true every day for the 17 years I have known her, unfortunately I can’t show you how much we meant to each other so I did my best to put it into words  So nana banana I read you the first half of this poem and I finally finished it  I promise Father I am almost done It’s called Nana With Love.